Gratitude

Let's start out with me clarifying that I am NOT glad in any way that I had a miscarriage prior to my pregnancy with Joaquin. I will never be happy that it happened. We lost a son or daughter - a life - and nothing can ever truly make up for that loss.

That being said, I like to try to focus on the positive in situations.

Being a parent to an infant is hard work. It involves sleep deprivation, the frustration of not knowing what you are doing, and a complete lack of personal time. For any parent those inconveniences are more than made up for with a simple giggle or smile from their little one. It's all worth it, of course.

But I think that for parents that have experienced a loss or struggles with infertility of any kind, there is an additional voice in your head reminding you of just how lucky you really are. All of those months (or sometimes years) of wishing for a healthy pregnancy and fearing that it may never happen flash before your eyes the moment you begin to feel sorry for yourself that you have not had time to get through one novel in three months. You remember all of those times you swore that if you were lucky enough to have a child of your own, you would never take it for granted. You remember all of the acupuncture, pills, doctors visits, temping at 5:00 am, and time you spent learning about fertility, all in the name of getting what you are fortunate enough to now have.

And in that split second, before you ever get a giggle or a smile from your baby, you forget whatever it was you wished you could be doing if you had the time and realize that now is the best time of your life.

I Give Up on Cloth Diapers

My intentions were good, but I just cannot keep using cloth diapers.

While I was pregnant, I spent some serious time researching cloth diapers and ultimately decided that I was going to use them for Joaquin. The benefits are many, as I discussed in my previous post on this topic.

But, now, three months in, I just can't do it anymore. I feel bad about it, but ultimately I think the switch to regular disposables is what is best for us for now.

Once we figured out that Joaquin's witching hour issues were curable by making sure he got regular, quality naps throughout the day it became imperative that I find ways to make sure he could stay sleeping as long as possible when he did go down for a nap. Unfortunately, his cloth diapers would wake him up immediately after he peed even the tiniest bit. This makes getting an hour or more of napping time almost impossible.

Also, once he got a little bit bigger, he would soak through an entire outfit almost every time he peed. So laundry got out of control.

A few days ago I thought I would give cloth diapers one last shot. I tried the All-In-One models that used to be too big for him. On the first try he soaked through an outfit about 10 minutes after I changed his diaper. On the second try we had a serious pooplosion incident that I really don't want to go into detail about.

So, now I am feeling a little guilty about failing to live up to the environmentally friendly standard I had initially set for myself. But Joaquin's total turnaround in terms of napping and the witching hour has me convinced that it is the best decision for all of us.

Joaquin's Three Month Photo Shoot

Some pictures

Just hanging out on the couch:


Joaquin's first time in the jogging stroller:


Joaquin in his big boy chair:



Jay and Joaquin with our favorite baby gear item:

Joaquin is making progress!

This month, according to the books at least, is when Joaquin should learn to roll over from tummy to back. We aren't there yet but he is definitely trying.

But, there has been a very pleasant development of a different sort. Joaquin has finally realized that his hands are, in fact, his! This is wonderful because now he can put them in his mouth when he wants to suck on them and, best of all, can reach for things he wants to touch. So, now I can put him in his bouncy chair that has some dangling toys that make noise and he actually plays with them instead of just getting bored and fussy in the chair. This is making taking a shower in the morning much more pleasant for me!

In other news, he has outgrown his 3 month sized clothes and has moved on the the 6 months sizes. With my very unscientific method of weighing him on our home scale, I estimate that he is just under 13 pounds now.

Finally Figuring Out the Witching Hour

From about mid-December until a week and a half ago, we were dealing with a seriously cranky baby from about 4:30 until 7 to 9 or so. He would cry and cry and we had no idea what to do to help. Feeding him didn't do anything. Holding him didn't help. We were at a loss and so frustrated.

Finally, after reading some books and talking to my mommy friend, Maren, we decided to try instituting more regular nap times during the day. The rule of thumb was to try not to let him stay awake for more than two hours at a time and to let him sleep as long as he wanted once he was down.

Well, this has been a miracle. Not only has the witching hour disappeared (knock on wood), but I am now enjoying a little extra time to get work done around the house while the little guy naps. It's a win-win!

5.75 hours of sleep in a row!

Last night, Joaquin went to bed at 6:45 and did not wake up to eat until 12:30! Wow. I hope this continues!